My insurance has finally authorized my surgery and the date has been set for early February! I turned 33 recently and I think that my life is about to change. Tomorrow, January 27th, I begin my 14-day liquid diet. I wanted to take a moment and reflect on my feelings and share my thoughts, as they are racing right about now.

When I decided to go through with this surgery, I learned about all the foods that I am to avoid after the surgery and some that I am not supposed to have ever again. On my Facebook support group I learned that many people were having "food funerals" and discussing their 'last meals' before beginning their pre-op diets. I have a very complicated relationship with food as I am an emotional eater, and I would turn to food when I was stressed or at a low point emotionally. Heck, I would turn to food when I was happy as well, like I said it was/is a complicated relationship. Food brought me comfort and joy, so when people discussed 'food funerals' I saw it as a way of saying goodbye to the beloved food that probably provided some sense of comfort over the years. 

I imagined that I would binge eat my favorite foods and that my 'last meal' would be some sort of pasta, but I was wrong and that was not the case at all. I was very moody today, and found myself in tears couple of times, but I realized that it was not because I was saying 'goodbye' to some specific food that I relied upon for comfort, but rather I was upset with myself, and still am, that I let myself get to this point where at age 32 I was preparing my body (the liquid diet) for this upcoming surgery that will alter my stomach. I think for that reason, I honestly did not even 'enjoy' my food today. I ate what I would eat on a regular day and I think that part of me was afraid of continuing this cycle of turning to food for comfort during a tough day. I wanted in a way to break the cycle and prove to myself that I am indeed ready for this surgery and to make a complete lifestyle change, not just for myself but for my family especially my sons. 

Here is my hour-by-hour prescribed liquid diet plan that I intend to follow for the next 14 days. I am very transparent with my VSG journey and I will try to provide couple of updates over the next two weeks discussing my progress and thoughts on the different protein shakes, etc. Wish me luck!!